Friday, December 8, 2023

Point Five Predictions: Puss in Boots VS Mao Mao

 

Poison


Mortadelae


Matti


Keith

“The cat is, above all things, a dramatist.”

-- Margaret Benson


Puss in Boots, the fearless purrcenary from Far Far Away.


Mao Mao, the undercat turned heroic sherrif of Pure Heart Valley.


Cats have long been known for their ferocity, independence, and perseverance, despite them also being silly goobers we love to ogle and cuddle. However, the sweetest cats have the sharpest claws, and these two aren't the exception--they're the rule. They've fought thieves, dragons and monsters alike, all for the thrill of being a hero (a little showboating doesn't hurt either), and now they're here to fight for their ninth lives en un danse espada!


Will Puss take over as the fearless hero of Pure Heart Valley, or will Mao Mao take este gatito to a grave far, far away? We're Point Five Blogs, and today we're taking a look at their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win in a DEATH BATTLE! 

Before We Start…

Much like in our last blog, we're working with characters with a great discrepancy in their available materials. To accomodate for this, for Puss's side we will focus on the films, Netflix show, and corroborating material while only using the tie-in games, TV spots and shorts supplementarily.


As for Mao Mao, we'll look at the TV show as well as any games, staff statements, TV spots, and other officially promoted material we can find so long as specific instances inside them aren't contradicted by the show. We only got one season of the show to work with, unfortunately, so we'll have to milk as much as we can. #JusticeForMaoMao


If you plan on watching either's material, be warned: Spoilers Abound!

Background

Puss in Boots


“Fear me... if you dare!


Fairy Tales tell not just stories to entertain children but valuable lessons for the adults they become. They tell stories of ogres with hearts (and farts) of gold, wizards with magic powers unrivaled, and most legendary of all, a noble swordscat who strikes awe in the hearts of men: Puss in Boots. Puss was born in the Spanish countryside. Harsh winds blew his basket into San Ricardo, where the town's orphanage took him in. Humpty Dumpty, a studious child, befriended the kitten and named him "Puss." Humpty told stories of his dream to capture the Golden Gosling atop the castle in the clouds. As teens, the two caused trouble and would steal from townsfolk. That was until Puss' instincts saved a woman's life, making him a hero and earning him his clothes. Unfortunately, Humpty tricked Puss into being framed, and the kitten left in exile. He later met El Guante Blanco, who taught Puss everything he knew before parting ways, leaving Puss with a new sense of adventure. One day, Puss met a cat named Dulcinea, who led him into the hidden city of San Lorenzo. The mage Sino founded the town as a haven for orphans and treasure and hid it with a spell that remained as long as everything remained in the treasury. You can guess what happened next. With thieves in town, Puss swore to become its protector until he could restore the Sino's spell. After many adventures, Puss restored every lost treasure from San Lorenzo. But the conniving satyr Uli used a spell to summon the Blood Wolf from the Netherworld. Though demon seemed invincible, Uli sacrificed himself to banish him for all eternity. However, the Netherworld's portal remained and posed a danger: its destabilization would destroy both worlds.


Puss and his friends journeyed to locate Sino, who concluded that he could not stop the planet's destruction, so armageddon claimed the world. Puss' personality was too strong to remain in San Lorenzo. So, under the condition that he retain his memories, Puss was sent back in time to never come to the town. Dulcinea joined in, and together they ventured in search of adventure. One day, after parting ways with Dulcinea, Puss overheard that Jack & Jill found the magic beans Puss abandoned finding years ago. After Puss tracked them down, Kitty Softpaws tricked him into chasing her to a tavern to reunite with Humpty. Puss agreed to join them to steal the beans, get the Golden Gosling, pay back San Ricardo and clear their names. Things were looking up as the three stole the beans and captured the Golden Gosling. But upon returning to San Ricardo, Puss learned that Humpty had Puss help steal the gosling to both claim Puss' bounty as revenge and use its mother to destroy San Ricardo. Puss convinced Humpty he was better than this, so the egg helped enact a plan to lure the gosling's mother away from town. Humpty sacrificed himself for San Ricardo, and Puss became a hero once again. Despite this, he left San Ricardo again, but now with cheers--not jeers. Over the years, Kitty & Puss' love deepened, and they engaged to wed in Santa Coloma. But alas, Kitty believed she could not compete with Puss' love for himself, and Puss had felt the unfamiliar fear of commitment. So, Puss left Kitty behind and became a mercenary for hire. Meanwhile, Princess Fiona sought her father's blessing in marriage. The problem was she loved an ogre: Shrek. Disgusted, the king paid Puss a hefty fee to kill him. Shrek defeated Puss, but he spared and befriended the tabby, and they sought the Fairy Godmother, whose magic Shrek hoped would save his marriage. However, she tricked Shrek into driving Fiona away and betrothed Prince Charming to her. So Shrek, Puss, and friends stormed the castle to defeat Fairy Godmother. Puss assisted Shrek as his occasional sidekick and pal, but the spirit of adventure still beckoned Puss, so he continued his adventures off-kingdom whenever possible. Puss' continued feats were not without faults. He grew reckless with his nine lives, wasting eight of them. This prompted Death to observe Puss, watching the end of each life he had failed to cherish. He sought to end this cycle personally. Puss had finally realized his mortality, so he retired to Mama Luna's foster house. There he met a happy-go-lucky perrito dreaming of becoming a therapy animal. But Puss wanted nothing to do with him. However, upon hearing that the mystical Wishing Star had returned, Puss donned his boots again to find and wish upon it with the pup tagging along. On his quest to get the Wishing Star's map, Puss ran into Kitty Softpaws. Softpaws also had eyes on the map, but Puss' abandonment soured their relationship, and the two would bicker. But she was not the only one with a grudge--Death continued stalking Puss in Boots, eager to kill. Puss realized the gravity of Death's approach, and so he began opening up to Kitty, who ultimately forgave him. But when all arrived at the star, Death showed up to finish what was started. But Puss wouldn't run anymore; his life had too much value to squander. Seeing this, Death spared Puss and wished him well. With the Wishing Star later destroyed, all left with new outlooks. Kitty reclaimed her love for Puss, Perrito found a name and home, and Puss learned to cherish what he has. With the newly-formed Team Friendship (working title), Puss set sail to new adventures. No matter where he goes, who he fights, and what he will do next, Puss in Boots is the epitome of a swashbuckler. He will forever be known as an outlaw, a hero, an adventurer, and, of course, a legend. Fear him--if you dare!


Mao Mao

You remind me of me, and I'm incredible. I'd be a fool not to recruit myself."


If any beings embody the words "legendary," "powerful," and "esteemed," they would be the felid warriors of the Mao Clan. Trained by their father, the remarkable Shin Mao, his five daughters received legendary golden weapons: a hat with endless storage capacity, a spear that can pierce anything, a high-speed wind-sailing scarf, impenetrable bangles, and contacts granting sight beyong sight. However, there was an issue. Shin Mao also had a son, the smallest of the family, affectionately named Mao Mao—yes, his full name is "Mao Mao Mao." This little tongue twister was often overlooked by his sisters and father. Yet, Mao Mao yearned for a weapon of his own. Eventually relenting, Shin bestowed upon him a sword the boy would soon name "Geraldine." Regarded as a mere toy by his elders, this sword still harbored great power. Mao Mao trained himself for years to become a skilled fighter, swordscat, and--most importantly-- hero. He left his homeland at a young age to travel the world and save those in need, beat up the bad guys, and become the legend his family thought he'd never be.


During this time he befriended an adorable corgi named Bao Bao. Together, they ventured through dungeons, vanquished thugs and villains, and became the most endearing badasses in all the land. However, while seeking treasure in a cave, a distracted Bao Bao ran off.


Mao Mao, in pursuit, was trapped when the cave collapsed, crushing his tail under a boulder and leaving him to face the world alone, having lost two pieces of himself in one day. He continued his journey alone until one day, when a group of rogue cybernetic bandits known as the Thicket Thieves ambushed him.


After swiftly defeating them, he befriended a hesitant member of the group, the cybernetic Badgerclops. They forged a close bond, and together, they embarked in search of further adventure.

And boy, did they find it! Mao Mao and Badgerclops crash-landed their Aerocycle into the enchanting, magical realm of Pure Heart Valley, a place cradling the legendary Ruby Pure Heart. This majestic crystal heart was the town's guardian, shielding the delightful sweetypies within from dark forces. Unfortunately, the heroes' tumultuous arrival damaged the artifact, diminishing its power and forcing Mao Mao to defend the town as its sheriff. Initially, Mao Mao felt a twinge of dissatisfaction as sheriff, contending with the sweetypies' naive antics. But during a fierce confrontation with the notorious Sky Pirates' Leader, Orangusnake, Mao Mao realized that defending it could cement his status as a legendary hero. With a rejuvenated sense of purpose, he welcomed Adorabat, a fearless 5-year-old sweetypie eager for battle, into their fold. Alongside Badgerclops, they formed the Pure Heart Valley sheriff's department, setting up their headquarters just on the outskirts of town. They encountered everything from the scheming Sky Pirates, a mimicking blob, colossal monsters, to hazards birthed from the sporadic energy surges of the Ruby Pure Heart. Perhaps the unintended descent into Pure Heart Valley was a blessing in disguise. It offered Mao Mao an escape from the shackles of his family's anti-cobbler negligence, an opportunity to mentor a young prodigy into a fearsome foe, and a chance to confront and partially overcome his deep-seated puppet phobia (don't ask). But this break from family issues didn't last; one day, Shin Mao visited Pure Heart Valley. The warrior tried his hardest to make him proud but to no avail. That was until a monster appeared and removed Shin Mao--revealed to be even smaller than his son--from his armor.


Despite his resentment over Shin's treatment of him and his friends, Mao Mao still had a heart for his papa. So to save the day, Mao Mao defeated the monster, saving his dad's life and earning his approval.

Through these trials and more, Mao Mao solidifies his status as a true hero day by day. Despite his occasional lapses as a lawman, his unyielding determination ensures nothing can deter him from his heroic calling of kicking ass, saving the innocent, and being so goddamn awesome. And then his show got canceled. Fuck you, David Zaslav.

Experience & Skill

Puss in Boots


From kittenhood, Puss showed remarkable intelligence and skill, mastering stealth and looting by his teens. He can swiftly identify & neutralize dangers and devise strategies to catch foes even faster than him. He is a skilled learner, too, able to learn in a day what normal thieves take years to master. Puss was taught everything he knew by the legendary El Guante Blanco. His training encompassed various fighting techniques, including sumo, dance-fighting, collar-and-elbow, cavalry, the Spinning-Through-The-Air Thing, and of course: fencing.

Puss uses two main fencing styles: esgrima común and Destreza. Esgrima común, an improvisational style effective with most swords and accessory weapons, is designed to surprise foes. Destreza, in contrast, focuses on calculated movements for extreme precision. In combat, Puss often improvises and thinks ahead, often using the environment to his advantage. He has been known to elude foes with stealth, climb & scratch their bodies, or rile them up via ambushes. This makes him highly unpredictable. Another one of his favorite tactics is disarming opponents and sometimes utilizing their weapons--he is not, however, immune to being disarmed himself.

Mao Mao


Mao Mao trained himself extensively using the Hero's Code passed onto him as a guide. By his teenage days, he was already wandering the world and fighting evil with great competence. He's learned stealth, manipulation, and weapon mastery to a great extent, all without going to school.


He doesn't seem to favor any specific fighting style. However, he has shown to be skilled in moves from styles such as MMA and, of course, kenjutsu. Kenjutsu was historically used by Japanese samurai, focusing on fluidity, precision, and power with a deep emphasis on mental discipline.


But Mao Mao isn't just brawn; he can also make complex plans on the fly and execute them perfectly. One time, Mao Mao learned the king had a secret dungeon under the castle. How? He smelled sulfur & limestone, found Snugglemange's itinerary, convinced Badgerclops to distract him, and made a cast of his foot to match a pawprint he found earlier. But if push comes to shove, improvising isn't off the table, either.


Mao Mao is definitely skilled in solo battles, but he fights best in a team. He's a great leader who coordinates formations to surround and subdue enemies. Fights usually end in the same vein as Team Rockets': he frickin' YEETS foes to the horizon! He doesn't always do this, though--he can and will kill if necessary.

Equipment

Puss in Boots

Rapier


Puss' iconic cup-hilted rapier, earned alongside his boots and cap to be used as a symbol for honor and justice. Despite its size, it is absurdly strong, able to cut wood, stone, or even metal. The sword is also quite tough, able to fight off weapons larger than even Puss' whole body and deflect bolts of evil magic.


Puss has found various other uses for his sword. He can throw it with incredible accuracy, use it as a lockpick, cut through bindings, or bounce on its flexible blade. He has even retrieved it after disarmament, sometimes in unconventional ways like tapping to create vibrations in the ceiling.


Rapiers are traditionally fought using cut-and-thrust techniques, ideal for parries and counters. As they keep a safe distance and cause damage from afar, these swords use typically defensive tactics for pure offense. Rapiers are complex weapons for this reason, requiring constant awareness of one's own position and movements.

Boots


What self-respecting Puss in Boots does not wear... well, boots? Puss' famous Madrileño cavalier boots are made from Corinthian leather and are almost never disrobed unless necessary.


These boots are not just for flair, however; they boost Puss' strength to send enemies flying by kicks that otherwise strain his feet. They are also vital for fighting, as without them he is unbalanced and awkward; even riding horses is a challenge without them.


Another use for Puss' boots is storage. Not only can he store items inside them, the cuffs hide secret pockets. Finally, Puss can use them as a floatation device.


He does not just own one pair of boots, however--he also has near-identical dancing boots to boost his moves. But once he starts dancing in them, it is hard to stop--so much so he danced away before he could pay for them!

Cavalier Hat


Puss' iconic beaver-felt cavalier hat also has some utility. The ostrich feather can be removed and used as a quill for writing, and its point is sharp enough to etch into stone as if it were paper. He can also throw it with such skill that it can arc like a boomerang.

Gatíto Blade


A side weapon gifted to Puss from Kitty. It is a tiny dagger that acts as a surprise side-arm tough enough to fight weapons like Death's sickles. It may also be used as a straight razor for haircuts.

Traps


Puss can build various booby traps using the environment. He can make pit traps, spear-shooters, rope traps, arrow traps and swinging traps all in a few hours with just sticks, rocks, and leaves. Using glue, Puss can create sticky traps to immobilize speedsters. He can even set up a wall of logs to limit fighting space.

Guitars


Puss is a skilled musician and can always grab a guitar when necessary, sometimes out of nowhere. He also uses them as weapons, at one point striking hard enough to stagger Kitty Softpaws and make her call off their fight. Talk about A Minor injury!

Felina


A holy twelve-toed cat. She appears to be the feline version of Mary, as the art resembles Our Lady of Guadalupe. Puss often pulls her icon out for spiritual guidance or a morale boost when things seem bleak. Aside from that, it is just a normal painting.

Catnip


A bag of ground catnip. Catnip is used by humans as herbal medicine to treat indigestion, anxiety, and insomnia. For cats it famously acts as a stimulant and can induce a wide variety of responses from restlessness to fatigue.


also haha funny weed joke

Babieca


Puss has gone through many horses during his adventures, but for this analysis we are focusing on his best: Babieca, a white Lusitano stallion. Puss can communicate with him verbally, understanding his neighs as if they were normal words.


Lusitanos date back to 711 AD as a cross-breed between Barb horses and wild Iberian horses. These horses are ideal for warfare and bull-fighting for their impressive strength graceful movements, and high intelligence.

Vehicles


Yeah, this is the limit as to how far we will go with Puss' "canon." In multiple games, Puss has driven karts with power-ups. He is also implied to know how to drive a 2007 Dodge Caravan in a commercial, so at least it is... consistent?


Given their supplementary status, Puss will only be given these as optional equipment. Items consistent across his other items, abilities or general tactics (such as stat boosts and invulnerability) are marked with a ǂ symbol, as will items that mimic similar things Puss has used.

  • Shrek Smash n' Crash: A Spanish fighting bull. These are powerful and aggressive animals bred for fighting, so riding one is considered a great feat of strength and stamina.
    • ǂShield: Temporary shields that block attacks
    • ǂJack o' Lantern: Places down a pumpkin that explodes on contact, stunning other drivers
    • ǂGiant Beanstalk: Grows a beanstalk tough enough to crash vehicles
    • ǂPixie Dust: A slight speed boost
    • ǂOgre Strength: Increases speed and acceleration for a brief time
    • Lord-Farquad-In-A-Box: Idly swings its head around to hit oncoming racers
    • ǂGoose: A goose that flies and attacks other racers. Peace was never an option.
    • ǂFrog Balloon: A homing frog that flies towards nearby foes.
    • ǂGarden Gnome: Shmebulock sends his regards.
    • Whirlwind: A small cyclone that wipes out anyone who gets close.
    • ǂSwamp Gas: A smokescreen made from swamp gas. Swamp gas primarily consists of methane, CO2, hydrogen sulfide and phosphine, all of which can be toxic if inhaneld.
  • Dreamworks All-Star Racing: A customizable stock car. In true Mario Kart fashion, doing tricks off ramps will make landings boost your speed, as will drifting around sharp turns.
    • Music notes: Boost karts' speeds slightly. 15 will call trolls to equip racers with Troll Surprises. Just do not sing to them--their grandmas might die, okay?
      • Soap Bubbles: An oil slick, but with soap. A Dawn commercial's worst nightmare.
      • Glitter Flowers: Attacks enemies and hazards with glitter.
      • Bug Spiral: Summons bugs that pick up nearby notes.
      • Cowbell: Rung thrice for a small speed boost each time. Perfect for fevers.
      • Troll House: Copies the kart's current power-up.
      • Super High Five: Boosts speed while maintaining momentum if spammed
      • Shining Heart: Invincibility.
      • Rhonda Bug: Helps move the kart towards the nearest racer.
    • ǂGuitar: Drops music notes for Puss to pick up
    • Poison Apple: A sticky green apple that detonates after a while.
    • Fairy Godmother's Wand: Not the same one from Shrek 2, mind you; this one just damages other karts.
    • Nanny Bag: A magic nanny bag that provides three random items.
    • ǂRotten Fish: Creates a slick of surströmming. Eugh.
    • Morning Star: A spiked ball on a chain fired from a wooden contraption.
    • Jade Swords: General Kai's jade swords from Kung Fu Panda 3. In this game, they are simply throwing weapons.
    • Monkey: A higher mammal that steals others' items.
    • Mind-Control Helmet: Slows racers down and discards their power-ups.
    • Noodle Cart: Blocks an enemy's vision by splattering noodles everywhere.
    • ǂYin-Yang Shield: A forcefield that protects the user and stops opponents.
    • Grappling Hand: Grabs and pulls in the closest racer for a boost
    • ǂBoots: Puss' character-specific item. We could not find any info or gameplay footage of Puss using them, so we can only assume these are simply spare boots for him.

Potions

Other Items


Similarly to the "Vehicles" section, each game item will only effect the verdict if consistent with Puss' prior items, abilities, and skills. Again, marked with ǂ.

  • ǂMakeshift weapons: When times are tough, Puss can make weapons from sticks and stones. He has made flint spears, a functioning bow with arrows, and (of course) a sword.
  • ǂOthers' weapons: After disarming foes, Puss sometimes steals and uses weapons and ammo for himself.
  • ǂGiant Ham: A large ham bone to thwack enemies.
  • Fart Wand: A scepter with Shrek's head that produces fart clouds. Shrek's farts have been stated to be able to kill animals as large as a donkey.
  • ǂFloating Air Mines: A backpack full of rockets to strike airborne opponents. Puss has used rockets as improvised weapons before.
  • Hammer of Smiting: A heavy metal maul made of silver.
  • Pot o' Gold Grenade: An explosive pot that propels coins at deadly speeds.
  • Fireball Wand: Fireballs shot from it explode upon impact.
  • Ice Wand: Shoots a projectile that briefly freezes foes in place. Once equipped, it disappears after a few seconds.
  • ǂBeehive: Sticks to people, causing the bees inside to attack.
  • Magnet: A giant horseshoe magnet that pulls characters in close.
  • ǂPirate Cannon: Shoots bouncing cannonballs around. While Puss has not used cannons like this cannonically, he knows how to use them and even attempted to shoot himself out of one.
  • Fairy Bazooka: Fires fairies that home in on targets. When fired at a distance, they drain targets' slamergy.
  • ǂViking Horned Helmet: Turns all attacks into slams. This effect stacks with the Fairy Bazooka.
  • Dragon Mask: A draconic mask that shoots fire from its nostrils.
  • ǂKing's Crown: When worn, onlookers cheer at Puss' regal getup, leaving them vulnerable. Puss' showboating and aforementioned treasure-hunting could make this consistent.
  • Magic Mirror Mask: Deflects projectiles that hit Puss' face.
  • Pill Bug Ball: Turns Puss in a ball and makes him sPeEeEeEeEn!!!
  • Dragon Sword: A sword that produces fire with its swings.

Mao Mao

Geraldine


Mao Mao's main weapon. Shin Mao initially thought of her as just a toy. But in reality, Geraldine isn't just a glowstick: she's a badass golden katana of everlasting light that can shoot huge blasts of light.


She can fire beams that blast rooftops, glow in the dark, and unleash blasts that can vaporize giant monsters in one go. Her blade can ignite for the "Fiery Cross Slash," and when iced she can freeze foes with the "Ice Slash."


Geraldine can be used as a harpoon, helicopter, or even a boomerang. She can also be used as a normal katana... if normal katanas could slice through iron and monsters like butter.


Katanas are durable swords used for a blend of offense and defense, and their curved blade allows for quick strikes in-and-out of the sheath. They're designed for short-form combat, specializing in cutting and slicing. Mastering them is difficult, as they are made for timing, precision, and coordination.

Aerocycle

Mao Mao's main form of long-distance transportation: a badass waterproof flying motorbike summoned via whistle. It's also powered by a gem cell, a magic crystal juicy enough to keep airships off the ground. The Aerocycle is outfitted with upgrades useful in combat:
  • Helmets: Riders--or at least the sherriff's department--have specialized helmets to protect from injury and wind. They also have built-in phones for two-way communication.
  • Boosters: Badgerclops installed quantum boosters on the Aerocycle that triple its speed. Mao Mao rarely uses it unless it's an emergency, though, as the upgrades aren't legal.
  • Lasers: Laser cannons installed in the front. The beams fire in straight, unbroken paths and don't usually explode upon impact.
  • Blasters: Shoots energy bullets in front. Just a few can pulp small monsters. They're upgradable, too!
  • Pulse: An electric blast from all directions damaging close enemies, even from behind or the side. It takes about five seconds for it to recharge, though.
  • Bomb: A powerful explosive that can be damaged to create an all-encompassing blast. They can also be thrown and ignited manually.
  • Shield: A repulsive force field that lets the Aerocycle take three hits without any damage.

Clothes

Mao Mao's clothes aren't just stylish, they're an important tool in and of themselves. Clothes were the first gift his dad ever got him as a kid (wow what the fuck man), and so he hates being naked.

His gloves, leg guards and waistband can of course act as standard light armor, but his cape is the real show-stopper. Not only does it look badass, but he can use it to glide long distances ala Super Mario World!

Disguises

Mao Mao's a master of disguise and has all kinds of outfits--"a million," in fact. He can craft disguises of both people and the environment, and through practice can perfectly imitate anyone's voice. Talk about "scary good."

Hero's Code

Mao Mao's Bible, so to speak. It contains generations of rules and strategies followed by the Mao Clan, used as a guide for heroism, combat, and not eating cobbler. Heroes don't eat cobbler. Why? Shut up, that's why.

Cobbler

Mao Mao's favorite food, much to the chagrin of his family. When he was little, his family made him destroy cobbler he bought, so he swore not to eat it again. However, he broke this promise and ate some as an adult. He soon learned that he didn't need to be bound by someone else's code; just his own. Through this he gained the power to channel his emotional baggage into his golden truth.

Cobblers date back to the Colonial era. They're made with a fruit filling and topped with flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, butter and milk into a baking pan. It's served by the slice, typically in family gatherings or other social events. But they don't last; a well-made cobbler can be irresistible, even for Mao Mao!

Growth Locket

In order to fight a huge(r than usual) monster, the magic tinkerer Camille offered Mao Mao a locket with the power to grow its user to colossal sizes (though it remains small). This increases one's physicality, but also makes the wearer more emotional and prone to wanton destruction. Thankfully, it can be reversed by re-pressing the button.

While the locket only appeared in one episode and never again, Mao Mao technically never gave it back. The last it was seen was when Badgerclops tossed it to him and Adorabat before they shrunk to normal and zoomed back to their house. Given Mao Mao's kept other one-off equipment, it's likely he still has it.

Or Parker Simmons just plumb forgot and Mao Mao won't use it again, who knows? Camille doesn't. Look at her with that smol lizard brain.

Fear Cannon

Another one of Camille's inventions. This BFG shoots a huge laser that penetrates the brain and extracts your deepest fears (it's ethical, dwbi). They appear as hostile shadows and are as corporeal as such.

Other Items
  • Binoculars: Kept in his belly. Really throws the whole "eyes bigger than your stomach" phrase off, huh?
  • Sunglasses: This blog nor Mao Mao's stomach are sponsored by Shady Rays.
  • Stealth Suit: An all-black spanex morph suit with spiked boots. They're useful for sneaking around, and the cleats allow him to walk on ceilings.
  • Laser Shuriken: A hira-shuriken with plasma blades. Its heat can cut through wood like butter. It breaks easily, though.
  • Smoke Bombs: While mostly used by Adorabat, Mao Mao can fling packets of smoke to stun opponents.
  • Plaster kit: Some gypsum plaster and a masonry trowel used to make quick casts of objects.
  • Hira-shuriken: Ninjutsu throwing weapons often thrown one or a few at a time.
  • Kunai: Trowels used as throwing or melee weapons. Can come in single or double-bladed varieties.
  • Sais: Mostly-defensive weapons used either for stabbing and catching blades.
  • Knives: Non-descript knives, likely used for quick, discreet cuts and stabs.
  • Magnifying Glass: Found in Mao Mao's stomach. Obviously needs constant wiping.
  • Lucky Duck Mug: A collectible mug. It's his favorite mug. Don't touch it.
  • Mao Mao Plushie: :3

Abilities & Techniques

Puss in Boots


Cat Physiology

Puss is a European shorthair tabby. Cats in this universe can learn human languages such as English or Spanish, both of which Puss is fluent in. Sufficiently intelligent cats can walk, run, and fight bipedally as well as on all fours.


Cats are considered by many to be nature's perfect hunters. Their ears each contain 32 muscles and can rotate independently for 360-degree hearing. Their noses are also superhuman, up to 16 times better in fact. Finally, cats' prehensile whiskers detect minute air changes to build a 3D map of an area and objects within. This is especially helpful as cats can react 4-5 times faster than normal humans.


Puss' retractable claws are extremely sharp and can pick locks. His sense of smell is also precise enough to count 500 people on horseback from afar, even down to what they had for breakfast.

Big/Cute Eyes

By far his most famous and effective technique: Puss takes off his cap, pleads, and widens his eyes unnaturally to woo whoever stares into them. This can be used to distract enemies and catch them off-guard. Even Sphinx, who was depressed for milennia, yielded to it. Puss can even use this as a form of hypnosis, controlling people through whispers.


However, they do not always work. For one, Puss cannot use them in the body of a less attractive animal. Anyone strong of will or devoid of heart can also resist the eyes, and even normal people have broken free. It also fails against those as cute as Puss. To counteract this, Puss has developed an extra-powerful version of this technique that can leave even cute kittens dazed!

Spinning-Through-The-Air Thing

Puss' second-favorite technique, perfected with training from El Guante Blanco. And yes, that is its official name. When Puss needs to control himself in the air, he splays his limbs and cartwheels. It also looks really cool.


This mirrors real-world cats' reflexes. In the air, cats reorient themselves by twisting their body to control their angular momentum, letting them survive high falls and land on their feet.

Spanish Splinter

Definitely one the most painful-to-watch moves we have covered (and that is saying something), where Puss stabs his rapier right in the nail bed (or similar anatomical structure) of his enemy. It works best if used on a giant.

Broadway Force

As a skilled musician, dancer, and singer, Puss has a knack for flair and riling up a crowd. This can result in him starting impromptu musical numbers which can make a more predictable environment for him to fight or just straight-up force you to dance. If you ever fall under this, be thankful that Antonio Banderas has the voice of an angel.

Slamergy

In Shrek SuperSlam, characters have a meter where attacks build up a meter. If Puss lands a hit on an opponent, he can build up "slamergy" that slightly increases his strength and speed. If he gets hit, however, some of his Slamergy will go to the perpetrator. When filled, he can expend his slamergy into a "Slam Attack."


Puss' Slam Attack is Hypno Puss, where he uses his Cute Eyes technique offensively to stun enemies, making them vulnerable to attacks. This is similar to the technique used against the Three Diablos, but it is unknown they are the same.

Nine Lives

In the Shrek universe, cats are born with nine lives. Whenever they die, they lose consciousness and wake up a while later as if nothing happened (though the timeframe is unknown). When their ninth life is up, they will be taken by Death.


While still preferring to avoid him, Puss laughed in Death's face throughout his nine lives. This made him reckless and crass even in his more strategic fights, and as a result he faced many losses:

  • 1st death: Trampled during Pamplona's Running of the Bulls
  • 2nd death: Mauled by dogs after cheating in a poker game
  • 3rd death: Walked off of a water tower in a drunken stupor
  • 4th death: Bisected by while bench-pressing without a spotter
  • 5th death: Obliterated after entering a cannon (the only way to fly!)
  • 6th death: Anaphylaxis from shellfish (remember your Epi-Pen!)
  • 7th death: Burned alive after setting an oven too high
  • 8th death: Crushed by a church bell after fighting a giant
The fractional death is labeled as such since it was negated in two ways: after dying, Dulcinea kissed Puss' body out of anguish, with true love's kiss resurrecting him. He was also sent back in time to before he first entered San Lorenzo, rewriting the timeline.

For reasons elaborated upon before the verdict, these extra lives are only used to analyze Puss' experience and intelligence--we are not giving Puss 8 extra lives for this analysis.

Baile Tremebundo


The Baile Trememundo (lit. "Tremendous Dance") is an ancient dance forbidden by most magic practicioners. The dance is supernatural, hypnotizing anyone who so much as glances at it into joining in--even Puss, who has resisted mind control before, struggled against it. Those hypnotized can be cured via outside distraction or when the host stops, though they forget dancing.


If enough people join in, they will chant the name of the demon K'foggnarh. If he is in or connected to the Netherworld, she will be summoned. However, K'foggnarh can only be controlled by the ruler of the Netherworld.

Strong Personality

Puss left San Ricardo because he was framed and exiled. He left San Lorenzo as his hubris led to the world's end. He does not stay long in Far Far Away as he yearns for adventure elsewhere. No matter where he goes or who he sticks with, Puss never stays in one place for one reason: His personality is too strong.


According to Sino, his power and bravado are incompatible with magical places and bends fate itself to endanger his locale the longer he calls it home. The eventual outcome? Earth's destruction. Granted, the only time this happened was in San Lorenzo. He fell in love with it, but to love something one must set it free, so he left it behind.

Other Abilities & Techniques

Resistances

Mao Mao

Cat Physiology


Mao Mao's name derives from the Chinese "猫" (māo), meaning "cat." This means his name's "Cat Cat Cat." As the redundantly redundant name of redundancy suggests, he's an Oriental shorthair, an Asian breed known for their large ears, daring personalities, high energy and sleek yet strong & muscular bodies.


As a cat, Mao possesses super senses via his eyes, ears, and whiskers, allowing him to fight even with his eyes closed. A cat's flexible skeleton also lets it squeeze into tight spots (typically >11 cm or 4.3" wide),something Mao Mao has displayed to an extreme extent. He also possesses a tapetum lucidum, a retinal membrane that reflects light and grants a night vision boost.

Body Control


Yeah, first and last warning for those grossed out by this kinda stuff.


Likely as a result of his training, Mao Mao can manipulate his own biology to an impressive degree. He's hypermobile, can erase his mouth to avoid talking, and (as shown below) can keep all sorts of things in his belly.


In perhaps his greatest display of this ability, Mao Mao once obliterated his own skeleton and moved around like a jellyfish. This was, of course, incredibly painful, and he could hardly move after the fact.

Stomach Storage


This dude's stomach is a bag of holding. For some ungodly reason, Mao Mao stores items in his stomach through a kind of hammerspace. While this ability's useful for keeping gear on hand, it can sometimes take a few tries to get whatever item he needs. It's also absolutely disgusting.

Explosion Generation


Sometimes, when Mao Mao gets pissed, he'll literally explode. All instances of these booms show little to no damage to the body, implying he's either tough enough to resist them or they only happen outside his body (imagine an EMP directed by Michael Bay).

Regeneration


Mao Mao can heal from damage considerably quickly. He can regrow teeth and a chipped ear almost instantly and heal from breaking every bone in his body with just a day's rest. However, even the healiest hero has limits. Healiest... is that a word? Fuggit, it's one now.


Anyways, if Mao Mao's injured somewhere that area grows frail, and further exertion can render it inoperable. And if a part's amputated (like his tail), it won't grow back.

Astral Projection


Through meditation, Mao Mao can detach his soul from his body. While only Adorabat, Badgerclops, and Melvin have done this in the show, Mao Mao--who's more experienced than the former two--should be able to as well.


In order to ascend, one must focus on their fears and push them deep into their subconscious to clear the mind. An easier method is just having tooth pain. The body's left behind, though it's now heavy and durable as the soul is "uplifting." Ba-dum-tss.


As for the soul, it's non-corporeal and pain-resistant. Because of this, it can distort itself by growing, stretching, or disintegrating without harm. Souls can also duplicate part or all of themselves and even teleport.


To return, projectors must desire as such and face their fears. Thinking about their earthly desires restores bodily senses to the soul and eventually drags them down to Earth in seconds.

Lunar Lash


Mao Mao & Geraldine's strongest technique. Mao Mao waves his sword and strikes with a huge wave of everlasting golden light powerful enough to vaporize almost any enemy, even ones tough enough to endanger Shin Mao.

Other Abilities & Techniques

Resistances

Forms

Puss in Boots

fat

"Feed me... if you dare!"

absolute chonguloid.

Mao Mao

Fever

"My body burns with a terrible fever. It's time for you.. to FEEL THE HEAT!"

Mao Mao once caught a cold as the Ice Dragon attacked Pure Heart Valley. Being sick decreases your body's energy as it focuses on the immune response, causing fatigue and weakness. Despite this, Mao Mao retained enough chutzpah to dodge and even push back the dragon's freezing laser beams (though with effort).

Mao Mao knew that in order to fight the sickness, he must embrace it. This gave him a power boost as well as a fiery aura from his fever. That's right--he weaponized his freakin' hypothalamus. The heat was enough to instantly thaw the Ice Dragon's cold attacks, allowing him to safely enter its mouth and defeat it in an awesome ice explosion.

Giant

"Clark? I think I've got it."

Fun fact, I was gonna call this form "Macro Mao Mao." Then I remembered what the Internet was and said nope.

There's nothing wrong with being small, but being big has even less problems. When using the locket, Mao Mao grows to hundreds of feet tall. The exact size isn't specified (or even consistent), but it looks to 10 meters at the very least.

While this increases his strength considerably, being blown up also makes you a bit overemotional, risking wanton destruction (or just becoming a fucking asshole).

Golden Truth

"I'm a hero.. and.. I eat COBBLER!!"

Mao Mao, ever loyal to the Hero's Code, refused to eat cobbler. But deep down he resented his father's strict and neglectful nature. So, when he realized he could follow his own code, this emotional obstacle cleared and Mao Mao could channel years of baggage into the Golden Truth Form.

In this state, Mao Mao's strength and toughness are boosted, though the amount isn't stated. Another boon from this form is the ability to create massive energy blasts from his fists.

This form requires Mao to concentrate on years of emotional repression in a situation that calls for him to overcome it--like how Super Saiyan forms are fueled by anger. This means he can't access the form willy-nilly, and the chances he'll use it in a regular fight are tenuous.

Feats

Puss in Boots

Overall


  • Regarded as a legend throughout all of 16th-century Europe

  • Redeemed himself in the eyes of San Ricardo's citizens

  • Earned a bounty worth whole bags of Spanish reales

  • Somehow got himself banned from 43 countries

  • Help Shrek stop Fairy Godmother's plans and Prince Charming's revenge

  • Overcame his fear of Death and fought him on equal grounds

  • Defeated Jack Horner, El Moco, The Scimitar, and Kitty Softpaws

Strength & Power

(oh come on you know we had to use this gif)


Speed & Agility


Durability & Endurance


Mao Mao

Overall


  • Saved Pure Heart Valley on many occasions

  • Discovered the secret entrance under King Snugglemagne's castle

  • Overcame his low self-esteem and moved past his neglectful upbringing

  • Saved his dad's life and earned his pride and approval

  • Defeated Orangusnake, Thicket Thieves, Ice Dragon, and the Shell Monster

  • Has a credit score of 850

Strength & Power


Speed & Agility


Durability & Endurance


Scaling

Puss in Boots

Shrek

"People used to think I was a monster. And for a long time, I believed them. But, after a while, you learn to ignore the names that people call you, and you just trust who you are."

The flagship character of Dreamworks itself. Shrek is a chill, introverted ogre that Puss has fought and injured before. While Shrek is technically stronger, Puss' fights with him proves at least downscales.

Goodsword & Scimitar

"A talking sword!"
"Said the talking cat."

The two swords of good and evil, both previously wielded by Thriffith. Puss could fight with a casual Dulcinea amped with the Goodsword for hours before taking a direct hit from her after being told to "really hit" him. As for the Scimitar, Puss has fought foes wielding it on fairly equal grounds and could even overpower it with some help.

Puss Squads

"Fear us... if you dare!"

The Junior and Senior Puss Squads were teams of protectors assembled to fight threats to San Lorenzo whenever Puss cannot do so on his own. The Junior Puss Squad were trained orphans while the Senior Puss Squad were allies gained on his journeys.
Taranis & Toutatis

"Aaaanyway. Feel the power of my MIGHTY WIND!!"

The Celtic gods of thunder and war. While Puss obviously does not scale to their full power, Puss has taken hits from them and Dulcinea can cause them pain. Puss has even survived Toutanis' axe's waves which could injure him. Thus their casual feats can be given to Puss.
The Great Mage Sino

"Now that I have returned, I must say... it is so weird having one body! It is like, when you get a haircut and look in the mirror, and you say, 'who is THAT guy?'"

You may have seen the "planet-level Puss" clip before, where Earth explodes and Puss is still there. As hilarious as it would be, he does not scale to the planet's destruction. However, Puss should still scale to Sino, the main focus of that scene. Here is the gist of why: Puss has proven comparable to Artephius, who is one half of Sino's power. He has also fought with Dulcinea, who was created with Sino's life force. Puss only lost their final fight as he refused to hurt her. Finally, Sino outright mentioned that Puss' power is incompatible with San Lorenzo, which was made with the Arcanum's magic. All of San Lorenzo, including its geography, is magic in nature.

Mao Mao

Badgerclops

"Ah, the perfect adventure! I got free food, and now I'm walking downstairs!"

Mao Mao's BFF forever! He's a big adorable cybernetic dweeb, ever chill and sweet yet still oh-so-deadly. Badg & Mao have proven comparable to each other multiple times, like when the former's arm pushed against the Ice Dragon's breath, which Mao Mao also did while weakened by sickness.


Adorabat

"Okay, Daddy, I'll mess 'em up. I'll mess 'em up real good! So good, their mommies and daddies won't be able to recognize them when I'm done."

One of the sweetypies inhabiting Pure Heart Valley. Her adorable bloodlust charmed Mao Mao into training her to become a great fighter. Adorabat's physically weaker than him and Badgerclops due to her age and size, but she's also competent enough to fight alongside them. Therefore, Mao Mao should upscale.

The Sky Pirates
"We're okay!"

The Team Rocket of Pure Heart Valley. These mechanimal goons are after the Ruby Pure Heart for its power and worth. However, they were swiftly defeated and marooned after their gem cell was used by Mao Mao for the Aerocycle and continue defeating them at least once a week. Despite their mooky-status, these guys are quite formidable in combat.

The Ice Dragon

"That's how germs are spread!? Well, that's news to me."

This is definitely the most important character for Mao Mao's scaling. When he got sick, this monster was starting to wreak havoc on the town and plunging it into a winter blunderland.

The Ruby Pure Heart

"Without its cloaking power, we're completely defenseless. I guess something big must have flown into it."

Mao Mao has demonstrated scaling to the Ruby Pure Heart itself. Not only has he defeated entities amped by it, him crashing into the gem cracked it. Mao Mao has also scratched into it with his bare claws.

Weaknesses

Puss in Boots


Puss is one cocky hijo de puta. While he has improved upon this fault, he still has the reckless, thrill-seeking attitude of an adventurer. He rarely takes fights seriously and has been caught off-guard by stronger foes. He also has a massive ego that can sometimes blind him, and has been humbled before by equally-skilled characters such as Kitty Softpaws.


Cats' hunting instincts make them easily distracted by small animals, shiny things, and string. Grabbing cats by the scruff induces a state called clipnosis, where they tense up and go mostly limp. They can also swim, but generally prefer not to as water mats their fur and weighs them down.

Mao Mao


Mao Mao's as feisty as a cat but stubborn as a mule. He typically prefers to leap into danger, even if it means disregarding his own safety. And once Mao gets going, he's hard to stop; he's obsessed with proving himself and will stop at nothing to do so. For example, he once pulverized his bones to save Orangusnake from drowning... just so he'd be the one to kill him himself.


Another weakness is, surprisingly, his emotional fragility. Likely stemming from his upbringing, Mao Mao's a sensitive lil man who tends to overreact. Like how he exploded with Bao Bao or gagged at the sight of a puppet. People like Tanya Keys have taken advantage of this before by getting into his head to fluster him.


Before the Verdicts

Why use the Netflix show?


The Adventures of Puss in Boots was developed internally at Dreamworks Television Studios, which also developed The Penguins of Madagascar and Kung Fu Panda: Legends of Awesomeness. These spin-offs are generally considered canonical as far as the general VS community is concerned, and for this reason excluding Puss' series would be against these standards.


Secondly, many of Puss' characteristics from this series are retained in following appearances and are consistent from prior ones. He retains his gear, skills, and experiences from the Shrek franchise. Conversely, events taking place prior have been mentioned--namely Puss' exile from San Ricardo and his status as an orphan.


The biggest contentions against the show being canon are that characters and settings from it are never brought up in subsequent material such as The Last Wish, and that it was presumably retconned after Sino sent Puss back in time. There are two counter-arguments for each:


1. We don't know what happened between the 2015 series and the 2011 film. The series ended with Puss and Dulcinea riding off on their horses. It was never stated in-universe or by the franchise's leads why she is not present later, so discounting her as non-canon is just as valid as saying she left or died.


2. Puss asked to keep his memories of his time in San Lorenzo. This is corroborated in The Last Wish by him cheating in poker, a game he had never heard of before the episode "Coin Toss." Therefore, events in the show are must have still happened. Thus, skills and feats he acquired should be applied.


Finally, according to series executive producer Doug Landale, the show takes place "long" before the events of the 2011 film. He even states that Dreamworks was involved in its production and approval, meaning it should at least have a canonical basis.


TL;DR: The series is officially-developed and stated to have a place in the timeline by the producer, and similar productions are treated as being at least mostly-canon. Dulcinea and Babieca being absent can have a variety of explanations. Puss retained his memories after being transported back in time, as evidenced by his knowledge of poker.

Is the Golden Truth Form standard?


When Mao Mao used his Golden Truth Form, a lot had to happen previously:

  • Mao Mao saved up as a child just for some cobbler
  • He learned that the Mao Clan forbade the dessert
  • His family shamed him for spending time saving up for it
  • Mao Mao was forced to destroy his cobbler with Geraldine
  • The mental scars built up years of repressed desire
This, couple with what Mao Mao said about the form, implies that it drew upon trauma-based emotional repression. Him giving into his desire to enjoy cobbler without remorse what triggered the Golden Truth Form in the first place, and it's likely that it can only occur again in a similar situation. That being said, it's not totally out of the question. We know Puss is flamboyant and has methods of getting into people's heads (the Baile Tremebundo, Mind-Control Helmets, him being cocky, etc.), so out of a hundred fights it's possible he could trigger the form in one or two fights. Even if we did let Mao Mao use his Golden Truth Form, though, there's just as many advantages as there are disadvantages for using it in this fight.

+ The form is likely far stronger than Puss' best consistent scaling...
- ...But Puss could negate it with Hypno Puss or various stat-boost items.
- Puss has fought faster foes before, like Jack Sprat w/ the Seven League Boots...
+ ...But he's likely slower than the Golden Truth Form by a considerable margin.

This means that Mao Mao has just as good a shot at winning against Puss with this form as he does losing, rendering it moot.

TL;DR: The Golden Truth Form needs too specific a circumstance to be reliable. Letting Mao Mao use it 100% of the time lets him take stats, though he risks being outlasted or negated via Puss' items or abilities, thus negating the form's effect on the outcome.

Measuring Mao Mao's maximum


By far the most-debated part of this blog's research was trying to figure out how strong this dang kimty even was. Thankfully, we narrowed it down to three sections:


Base Form:

On his own, Mao Mao's most consistent feats are in the Tier 7 range. The Lunar Lash was calc'd at 11.5 megatons and fighting the Ice Dragon scales him up to 286. His other scaling backs this up, with feats from others ranging from kilotons to megatons.


Where it gets tricky is that the Ice Dragon's breath overpowered Badgerclops Badger Beam after it was charged to 100 times its power. Both Badg and Mao are absolutely on par with one another given they can fight together and the latter defeated the Thicket Thieves minus the former. However, it's unlikely Mao Mao scales to 100x the Ice Dragon's shown feats in base form for two reasons:

  • It contradicts the established plot and the need for his Fever form. Mao Mao could only defeat the dragon by blowing it up with his sickly sneeze, and when sick he was clearly amped. The games contradict this by having him defeat the dragon in base form.
  • It's an outlier. Mao Mao is already on par with Badgerclops normally, so him suddenly being 100 times stronger than him in one episode and never again for an unexplained reason just doesn't make sense in the context of the show or VS.
Sick and Golden Forms:
These two required some brainstorming. First of all, given their purposes as temporary power-ups caused by specific negative circumstances culminating in positive epiphany, we can assume both forms are at least somewhat comparable. Secondly, we can estimate their max outputs in two ways:
  • Low ends: The 100x multiplier from before. The multiplier's results are already the highest we've seen the 'verse get, and the Golden Truth Form is likely much stronger than Badgerclops' best. As mentioned in "scaling," this yields anywhere from 170 megatons to 28.6 gigatons. Given the multiplier's stated in its debut episode, It's likely this is where the Fever form sits.
  • High ends: We had to get creative for this end. The only feat for the Golden Truth Form is him tossing the Hog Monster to the clouds, which got 3.6 kilotons. Compare this with him doing pretty much the same thing in base and that's a multiplier of 50.7 to 18,000. We can extrapolate this further by upscaling this from his best direct feat: the Lunar Lash. Doing this yields high ends of 583 megatons to 207 gigatons (Mountain to Large Island).
As for speed, we pretty much have no way to tell. These forms are definitely FTL when upscaled from Adorabat and Orangusnake, but to what extent it's hard to say without vaguely guessing or applying arbitrary multipliers. Either way, he's fast as fuck, boi.

Giant Form:
This one is actually really easy. Similar to the high ends of the last two forms, we can just upscale Mao Mao from his best direct feats, since users of the Growth Locket move proportionally just as fast and are boosted accordingly.

We can do this through the Ugarik-Jasonsith Model, a brilliant series of formulae created by fellow VS debaters Ugarik and Jasonsith (the latter being one of our researchers and calcers).

Using their formulae, and assuming Mao Mao's giant state is ~10 meters tall (the size fluctuates pretty wildly in the episode), we get these values:
  • Attack Potency: 11.5 megatons in base, 1.82 teratons (Small Country) when giant
  • Movement Speed: 0.44 c in base, 4.81 c (FTL) when giant
  • Reaction Speed: 1.32 c in base, 14.44 c (FTL+) when giant
Suffice to say, despite what's presented, the Growth Locket is Mao Mao's trump card here as it boosts him far higher than Puss' most consistent feats and scaling. However it can be argued that all of Mao Mao's forms are stronger than what Puss can dish out physically.

But it's not a clear shot, either--as stated previously, Puss has fought foes faster and stronger than him before and he still has his items and abilities that could match Mao's forms. So it all comes down to how their intelligence and strategic thinking compare.

TL;DR: Mao Mao's weaker than Puss in base, but his forms are generally superior. Only his giant form can be measured with certainty; this form breaches country-tier power and FTL+ speeds. However, Puss can still contend with these forms via his items and abilities, so it just boils down to who's more likely to outsmart and outlast the other.
Puss in Boots: His Nine Lives

Yeah, this one's easy to answer. Much like Death Battle, we aim to give characters their best standard kit. But, unfortunately for Puss, this means we cannot give him his extra lives. Puss' gained experience through them as well as his standard equipment (like the Gatito Blade, for instance) can't be included if we did as that'd break the rules of the character as he currently stands.


It's like giving Alucard from Hellsing all of his other abilities while allowing him to exist after absorbing Schrodinger: it wouldn't make much sense given the rules of the character's world when looked at in a vacuum.


But this also provides a benefit, as he's more likely to take the fight seriously now that dying's permanent--he even outright stated that he'll never stop fighting if it means he can keep his last life.


TL;DR: To maintain his best standard experience, kits, and skillsets, Puss can't be given any extra lives as it wouldn't make sense both logically and canonically. Puss actually benefits from this handicap as he'd be more inclined to fight seriously.

The Baile Tremebundo

First off, yes, Mao Mao would likely join the Baile Tremebundo. He's never displayed any mental resistances stronger than Puss, and not even the Stabby Tabby himself (who as mentioned before resists mind hax) can break free on his own. Mao Mao also has struggled with temptation before as evidenced with his cobbler. Even if he could resist the dance initially, Hypno Puss could stun him into vulnerability.


Secondly, Puss almost certainly can't summon K'foggnarh to fight for him; she's only summoned through a link to the Netherworld, either through a magical anklet (like Shiela wore) or if Puss is in the dimension itself. Puss can't open a portal to the Netherworld by himself; if he could, it'd eventually destroy the planet--something he wouldn't risk happening again. And even then, K'foggnarh can't be controlled by anyone other than the ruler of the Netherworld, which Puss certainly isn't. And even then, Mao Mao could simply BFR her beyond the horizon as he's done to so many others before.


TL;DR: Mao Mao hasn't shown mental resistances strong enough to negate the Baile Tremebundo; even if he did, it's not guaranteed he'd be immune for long. K'foggnarh can't be summoned as that requires a connection to the Netherworld, which Puss can't (nor would) start.


Puss am become death, destroyer of fiction

Let's address the big bad wolf in the room. We know that he's fought Death directly and even gave him a nosebleed. However, the wolf is not the full, true concept of death itself fighting against Puss.


"And I don't mean it metaphorically or rhetorically or poetically or theoretically or in any other fancy way. I'm Death, straight up. And I've come for you, Puss in Boots."


He's not metaphorically or poetically death as he's addressing himself as such and it's his job is to take souls. He's not rhetorically death, either; he's transparent about what he's doing and why. So why say he's an avatar if he's literally Death? A few reasons:

  • There's no strong evidence his body is conceptual. He's never been shown to regenerate from damage, no special tool or ability was used to fight him, and he even said he's not death "in any other fancy way," which would include conceptually. I.e., Death's his name and his job's to reap the deceased.
  • We don't know the extent of his powers. He has powers one would associate with the Grim Reaper, like teleporting to those who'll die, using harvesting tools as weapons, and making barriers to prevent escapes. But that's it--we don't see regeneration or even death manipulation. Therefore, we can't just randomly assume he has a conceptual physiology like Discord from My Little Pony or the Thought Robot from DC Comics.
  • Puss bested him in direct physical combat. The biggest argument for Puss' concept stuff is also the biggest one against it. Puss beat Death fair-and-square in terms of fighting capability. You can cheat death, but not beat it. When Puss fought back, Death struggled and ultimately lost, and in Jack Horner's death, the wolf was absent. And he did die--there's no scene, author statement or scrapped storyboard/concept art we could find implying otherwise.

TL;DR: Puss did in fact defeat Death, but there's not enough evidence suggesting Puss overcame the concept of death itself in The Last Wish. We know very little about Death's true power or abilities, and there's more evidence to suggest he's simply the Grim Reaper. Puss defeated him in combat yet death as a concept remained unchanged, and Death's iconic speech implied that Death is just his proper title.

Verdicts


Team Puss

Stats 

Mao Mao is absurdly strong. Even his lower ends make him city-level at least, and he has multiple relativistic feats to boot. His higher ends place him well within Mountain Level to Island Level. But the thing is, Puss not only matches that but surpasses it by a considerable margin. 


Mao Mao's best strength & durability scaling is ~29 gigatons, while Puss' clocks in at over twice that much. Mao Mao's scaling makes him faster, but not by much--Puss has similar feats and scaling, like Dulcinea running from the Tiny Queen's lasers or Puss dodging blasts from the Lorenzo Lapis Lazuli. Through these feats (and reading through the treasury in seconds), it's clear that Puss is still fast enough to tag Mao Mao.


But as far as physicals are concerned, Puss is likely still outclassed by Mao Mao's forms--especially his giant form. However, Puss isn't entirely helpless here--Puss has fought characters physically superior to him before (like the Blood Wolf, Shrek, and the Sleeping Giant of Del Mar). Puss' gigaton end is also just his most consistent--he can theoretically scale much higher, up to Small Country, which can at least match Mao Mao's giant state.

Arsenal & Abilities

While Mao's latent abilities are more impressive than Puss's, they have exploitable limits. First, while Puss could potentially trigger it in some scenarios, the Golden Truth Form is unlikely to be used in a fight like this. Similarly, Puss can't get Mao Mao sick, so the fever form isn't an option. As for his giant form, Puss has numerous items and techniques to counter it and potentially his other forms. He can control Mao Mao's mind with the Big Eyes or Baile Tremebundo, buff his stats with his potions and items, or use more direct counters such as the Frog Grog Supreme or Spanish Splinter. Puss can harm Mao Mao's soul but said soul can regenerate from being torn apart, meaning Puss can't finish the fight spiritually. But Mao Mao's body, although durable, is still susceptible to damage and won't heal in time to negate amputation, organ damage, or fatal blows. Body control won't be of much use, either. While he can negate chokeholds, neck snaps, and grapples, Mao Mao can still feel pain, take damage, and die. Keeping extra items in his stomach is impressive, but he risks coughing up the wrong thing, and there's no way he can use his stomach ability offensively or defensively while still in-character. Don't think about what that implies.

Tertiary Factors


Both fighters are a near-equal match. Mao has speed, while Puss has power. Mao Mao's more toony, but Puss has better hax. Both their arsenals are capable in their own right. And while they're both just as intelligent, Puss edges out in one crucial category: experience. Puss has lived nine lives worth of adventures, fighting demons, colossi, the Grim Reaper, and even gods. Mao Mao and Puss have both fought monsters, bandits, and pirates, but the former has little experience outside that scope. For example, Puss defeated Bigger Jack Horner and the Giant of Del Mar, while Mao Mao struggled against similarly-sized foes like the kaiju-sized monster in Ultraclops or Mechahossarafforangusnakerrang. Mao Mao's training and emotional issues put him at a disadvantage, as well. El Guante Blanco, already a famous legend, taught everything he knew to Puss. He taught him many fighting styles, techniques, and strategies, including multiple martial arts. Mao Mao, on the other hand, was self-taught, never went to school, and never displayed fluency in as many fighting styles. The Hero's Code could close the gap in experience with its written history, but Mao Mao still needs to pull it up for advice and has even gone against it multiple times. Even then, Puss can still swipe the book and read through it himself, gaining all of Mao Mao's combat knowledge on top of his own.


This is the story of a cat who became a hero, an outlaw dedicated to justice, and a lover of beautiful women. I am Puss in Boots, and my name would become... legend!


Stat Summary:
  • Tier: At least Island (62 gigatons), higher with items & powerups

  • Speed: Relativistic+ (93% c), possibly FTL (1.83 c)

  • Intelligence: Genius

  • Hax: Enhanced senses, emotional manipulation, broadway force, mind manipulation, non-phyiscal interaction, minor fate manipulation, (possibly) transmutation, stat enhancement, summoning

  • Resistances: Emotional manipulation, mind control, corruption, toxins


Advantages:

  • Stronger and tougher than Mao Mao's base stats

  • More varied and unique items at his disposal

  • Better training, book smarts, and experience

  • Hypno Puss and Baile Tremebundo negate mental resistances

  • Stat amps could potentially match Mao Mao's forms

  • Sigma male

  • Please watch "The Adventures of Puss in Boots" on Netflix, it's so good


Disadvantages:

  • Notably slower, especially against Mao's higher forms

  • Mao Mao's soul can regenerate while Puss can't at all

  • Few ways to end the fight quickly, especially with his cockiness

  • His lack of spare lives means resurrection is off the table

  • Has been outsmarted by comparable opponents before

  • Absolute garbage in Shrek SuperSlam

  • Women


In summary, Puss' might, experience, tools and tricks would most likely prevail over his legendary adversary in an absurdly-close brawl. It may break your heart to hear this, but Mao Mao should've pussied out before he got the boot. But hey, at least it's all over, mao!



Team Mao Mao

Stats 

Mao Mao's strength is nothing short of impressive. His feats solidly place him at city-level at the very least, with the potential to reach Mountain or even Island Level. Comparatively, while Puss in Boots scales to double hiss 30 gigaton-maximum, Mao Mao has fought foes stronger than him before, and his direct feats are still superior.


While both have light-timing feats, Mao Mao's happen more often, so they're more consistent and rely less on interperetation. Mao Mao also scales to two blatantly FTL feats: Orangusnake dodging the Badger Beam and Adorabat moving away from the ice beam. At best, the two are even regarding movement vs. reactions, but you can't move your fist in and out (pause) as fast as you can blink, so it'd hardly matter.

Finally, Mao Mao's higher forms are simply too much for Puss to handle. Sure Puss may have his items, and abilities to match or outlast them, but given Mao Mao's more ruthless approach, it's unlikely Puss could act before he'd get blitzed. Sure his Golden Truth Form and fever are unlikley in this fight, he can still grow in size. At that point, since Mao's proportional speed remains, it might be game over.


Arsenal & Abilities

This one's pretty straightforward: Mao Mao's abilities just too much going for 'em. His regeneration, while limited, is useful for patching up minor injuries--especially in conjunction with Mao Mao's insane body control. has over his whole body. Even with his bones pulverized, Mao Mao was could move, so Puss might tire himself out before Mao Mao could be killed from injury alone.


The Big Eyes also wouldn't work. Mao Mao has powered through Adorabat's zing beams which directly harmed the ego. Hypno Puss negates this, but given Mao Mao's faster and can fight without looking, it's unlikely to land. Puss' dancing could also work, but it can still be interrupted. Mao Mao's more than smart enough to figure out a way around this.


As for arsenal, it's true Puss has more variety, but what Mao Mao does have makes up for it. The Aerocycle is simply superior in speed and firepower than Puss' bull or kart, capable of evading their items and retaliating with its own. His disguises could fool Puss, even if he'd be smart enough to figure them out later. There's also Camille's locket, which gives Mao Mao easy access to his giant form. And you know how that's a game changer.


And finally, Geraldine is easily far more powerful and versatile than any of Puss' normal weaponry. Puss' rapier's tough, but it has been disarmed and even broken in the past. Meanwhile, Geraldine can bend without breaking, fly Mao Mao around, and use powerful elemental attacks. She may not be the end-all-be-all in Mao's kit here, but she definitely helps more than Puss' main gear.


Tertiary Factors

Believe it or not, both are pretty even here. Puss has a huge experience edge with his nine lives, and Mao Mao's pretty much never fought anyone like the Celtic gods, Death, are the actual rulers of Hell. But Mao Mao possesses the Hero's Code, which contains generations of documented stories and strategies passed down through the Mao Clan. Mao Mao can simply read through it and get the know-how he needs to catch up.


Regarding skill, it's true that Puss has him beat in book smarts. However, Mao Mao's strategy is simply on a whole 'nother level as evidenced with King Snugglemange and Rufus & Reg. The Hero's Code has helped him use conventional and non-conventional strategies before, and he can still improvise just like Puss. Plus, Mao doesn't need to hypnotize his foes to use deception or manipulation, which Puss rarely does without the eyes when you crunch the numbers.


Finally, Mao Mao may not have gone to school, but he didn't need to--he was self-taught, meaning all the techniques and abilities he's learned in his 30+ years were learned without outside assistance. This gives him a huge edge in street smarts over Puss. And you know what they say: you can't stop a mugger with calculus.



All that training, the adventures we had, the monsters we defeated... you've been with me through all of it, Geraldine. I know, now--it's not the sword that makes the hero: it's the bond!


Stat summary:

  • Tier: Mountain (286 megatons), possibly Island (29 gigatons) to Small Country (<1.8 teratons) with transformations

  • Speed: FTL (2.6 c), FTL+ (<14 c) with transformations

  • Intelligence: Genius

  • Hax: BFR, enhanced senses, body control, regeneration (high-low), photokinesis, explosion manipulation, astral projection, disease manipulation, size-shifting, minor 4th wall breaking, sleep inducement, non-physical interaction

  • Resistances: Emotional manipulation, toxins, acid manipulation


Advantages:

  • Most transformations likely eclipse Puss in stats

  • Faster with higher ends, comparably fast without

  • Better stealth, strategy, and street smarts

  • Can resist the Big Eyes initially

  • Better offensive weaponry

  • Parker Simmons is rooting for him

  • Please watch "Mao Mao: Heroes of Pure Heart" on Prime Video, it's so good


Disadvantages:

  • Potions and mind hax can negate Mao Mao's stats

  • Healing is too weak to matter in the long run

  • Likely unable to trigger Golden Truth and Fever forms

  • Astral projection leaves his body and soul vulnerable

  • Has also been outsmarted by comparable opponents

  • Only one season (fix your shit, Zaslav)

  • Women


This battle was pretty close, and Puss can certainly win a few fights with his power and arsenal. But Mao Mao's superior speed, transformations, and abilities won the war. Puss just wasn't up to bat. Maybe the next thing Puss stars in can give him even better stuff, but we can only wish!


Final Tally

Team Puss in Boots (6) - Lanturn, Keith, Max, purple Demon, DBEmerald, community vote


Team Mao Mao (9) - Matti, MC Charles, Mortadela, Smashor, Phoenix, Bluegatito, Poison, Lightbuster, Ningen Slayer


They'd just get some leche together (2) - Garf, MKF4


Winner




Next Time...


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